In my June Newsletter, I raised the issue of why we say, "How are you?" to customers at the beginning of a call!! This is what I said in the newseletter.
I doubt if this is a genuine inquiry with regards to health. Over the years I've tried to determine what this is all about. I've come to the conclusion that it is the telephone equivalent of a handshake.
Have you ever wondered why we shake hands or why we use our right hands to shake hands? Perhaps it’s because in ancient times when two people met you didn’t know if they were a friend or an enemy. You approached the other person with caution – right hand extended. Would they grab their sword and run you through? If we both grab each other by the right hand then neither of us can go for our swords. The need for caution has passed but we have kept up the tradition of shaking hands.
Just as handshakes can be weak or firm, so can our response to be "how are you". A weak response might be the throwaway line, "I'm okay" whereas a firm response might be “I’m really well today”. You can use this moment to lift the emotionality of the call.
I know that some of you are working with this so I though it would be good to make it the subject of this month's blog. Have you listened and responded to the "how are you?"? Has it made a difference to the emotionality of the call?
Any comments??
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2 comments:
"How are you" and other phrases are, in my view, part of the social machinery people use to connect with others. Rarely does the person uttering the statement expect, or even care, what the response is.
The aware sales consultant can use this to advantage in a very simple, yet effective manner. If on the telephone the originator simply has to smile as they speak and EXPECT A MEANINGFUL ANSWER.
The very fact of 'being there,' and 'caring' can have a magical effect and communication is enhanced.
Yes, the comment is the equivalent is the same as a handshake and, if the principles outlined above are used, the response can be amazing. Thank you for bringing up the question.
Regards,
Ollie Lind
In the situation Graeme describes, asking 'How are you?" is fraught with many potential problems and dangers. And this is the case even if you honestly care, are sincere and think it is a great way of building rapport or breaking the ice.
The problem is that the person you are talking to probably unlikely to develop a particular connection to you because you have enquired, is probably busy and the question is not relevant to them at the time or to the conversation which follows, and what happens when they really tell you? So asking "How are you?" may seem like a nicety but are you prepared for the answer?"
"Well actually I'm not well, my kid's in hospital, I'm very busy and what are you really phoning me about so we can get on with it."
If you feel compelled to make some enquiry about their health, how about just saying: "I hope you are well?" or "I hope everything is going smoothly today"
Mark McPherson markmcpherson.com.au
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